Self care versus soul care
Truth be told, I’m not a huge fan of the phrase self care. Though everyone defines it differently, self care seems to take a material edge. Pedicures are self care. Facials are self care. Getting unwanted hair removed via hot wax is self care.
Don’t get me wrong. I love a good facial and have zero issue with toenail maintenance or waxing. AND the flip side of that kind of self care is its alliance with societal pressure that women must maintain a particular beauty and body standard.
It’s hard to know what to do with that.
YES I love getting pampered and there’s an underlying, little discussed, reason why I do it that is completely unrelated to true care.
In this culture we aren’t taught how to truly care for ourselves and so we’re left with the beauty-maintenance type of care that, though nice, only keeps us fed for a brief moment.
That disconnect sent me looking more closely at care, to find something beyond self care that could access a purer level of nourishment that a pedicure never could.
Enter soul care.
Soul care settles you into yourself. Soul care brings air to your lungs, movement to your body and inspiration to your soul. Soul care brings out the best in you. Soul care reminds you who you are.
I’ve recently started having my clients create soul care lists and, interestingly enough, no two lists are alike.
Because soul care is intrinsically personal. It’s what nourishes your heart and soul, not what you think you have to do to be or look a certain way. (And yet I’m sure if I’d asked my clients to make self care lists, all that beauty shit would’ve popped up.)
Soul care lists are living documents, something to add to and check in with to make sure what’s there is still feeling you.
And what’s so beautiful about soul care is, if we’re connected to our needs, it’s allowed to change.
6 months ago my top three soul care items were:
Salsa dancing Girl-time dinners Creating Just F*cking Journal
Currently my top 3 soul care items are:
Long talks with my dude Dancing to Sly and the Family Stone while cooking Sleeping in and taking naps (I still can’t believe this one is on there. A true testament to change.)
All are soul care yet what’s takes top billing is a reflection of the care I need at this time in my life, which will most likely change 6 months from now.
So take a moment today to create your soul care list.
Ask yourself… How would I ideally like to care for myself? What actions/activities reconnect me to ME that I rarely make time for? What are 3 ways I can feel closer to myself right now?
The list doesn’t have to be long or exhaustive. Simply let yourself jot down what kind of care would feel best at this time in your life.
Also, this list doesn’t replace your self care list or even change it. (Cuz I’m in NO WAY giving up facials.)
Instead, think of your soul care list as a deepening into your next level of care.
After making your soul care list, and if you feel so inspired to share, I’d LOVE to know what’s on it. Simply hit 'reply' and let me know.
All my love and enjoy your soul care,
P.S. If you struggle with giving yourself permission for soul care or have a hard time imagining what soul care even looks like in your life, sign up for a one-on-one clarity session with me. During our hour together we’ll see what boundaries are in your way, reconnect you to what you value most and create a plan to make soul care a reality in your life.
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