In praise of the LOVE BUCKET
Ever have one of those days when everything is fine, nothing particularly bad has happened and for some reason you get clobbered by a wave of discontent, panic or self-doubt? Suddenly you’re set adrift, fumbling about in a sea of self-criticism, anxiety, or worry, desperate to not feel any of this and looking for the someone or something to pull you out of it.
Well, that was me just the other day.
I sat down at my computer to work on the new guide for my soon-to-be released app (wahoo!) and was suddenly overwhelmed by, well, everything. In a split second I decided that 1) I was a terrible, lazy writer 2) that I had nothing to say 3) that this guide would be useful to NO ONE and 4) who was I anyway to be writing any of this shit.
Needless to say I required help fast as my inner critic was going BANANAS.
Thankfully I remembered my Love Bucket.
A Love Bucket is an e-file where I store all the emails from people in my life who send me love. The bucket is filled with beautiful, heart-felt emails from clients and blog readers thanking me for my work and writing. (And if you’ve ever sent me one of these emails, THANK YOU. For real.)
Now you may be thinking, “Jamie, you’re a freakin’ coach. How can you still be dealing with this inner critic, self-doubt stuff? Shouldn’t you be able to get back on track without needing a Love Bucket?”
The answer is, like you, I’m human. And being a human means being messy, imperfect and ever-changing, sometimes, from one moment to the next. Some days I can take a deep breath, get present, thank my inner critic for her opinion and firmly tell her that she’s off-duty because I GOT THIS. Other days I need someone else to remind me of the goodness that’s inside.
So, today I invite you to start a Love Bucket. Go through your emails and pick out a few sweet notes from people in your life who love you, appreciate you and think you ROCK. Also drop in inspirational emails or blog posts that bring you back to center. (A number of my clients like to add my weekly emails to their Love Bucket.)
Visit your bucket every time you feel disconnected from yourself and need a strong dose of love to come back to your innate awesomeness.
And if you don’t have any emails or inspirational notes you want to put into your bucket, email a dear friend and ask them directly for a much-needed pump up.
Not sure what to say?
Title: I need a bit of love.
I’m in the middle of rough moment and need some love.
Would you please remind me that I’m __________ and that __________. If you could also tell me __________ I’d be so grateful.
Thank you for being my friend, for loving me up and for bringing me back to myself when I feel lost.
You are the best!
Love, [Your name]
I’ve sent this email out a number of times and always get back exactly what I need to hear.
Enjoy creating your love buckets AND, if you feel so inspired, I’d love to see how you fill out the “I need a bit of love” email. Simply hit reply and send it on over.
P.S. If the thought of sending the “I need a bit of love” email feels uncomfortable, let’s set up a time to talk. As women who tend to be the friend or family member that holds everything together, it’s awkward and scary to directly ask for support. Sign up for a FREE 20 minute consultation here and we’ll get you clear no how to open your heart for the help you need.
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